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Psy-Kosh comments on Poly marriage? - Less Wrong Discussion
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That part should be easier. Base it off genetic testing with biases towards whichever of the two parents is the one that had the child burst forth screaming from their genitals. Further modify implementation of rights by discretionary judgements made in favor of the child's best interest. Basically, do exactly the same thing that the system should do now without the poly relationships being formal.
Hrm... not sure such a bias makes sense, especially in a group marriage where everyone was involved in raising the kids, for example. (Again though, I'm not saying these things are unsolvable. Just... there's a bunch of little things like that that would, in fact, have to be specified.)
(I'll avoid commenting here on the extent to which the system presently mucks things up, since that's outside the scope of the discussion.)