FMA fans: for no particular reason I've written an idiosyncratic bit of fanfiction. I don't think I got Ed & Al's voice right, and if you don't mind reading bad fanfiction, I'd appreciate suggestions on improving the dialogue.
It's close enough for the purpose of the story. I could tell who was saying what the whole time. I don't think Ed would be that certain about ethics, he never seemed that way in the show (I never read the manga), and it seemed like you were trying to hard to force his hotheadedness.
To me, the sign of poorly written fanfiction is when the author tries to shoehorn details from the original work even when its not necessary. There wasn't any reason for the gate to be involved, and the Elrics didn't really have cause to connect the philosopher's reference to t...
If it's worth saying, but not worth its own post, even in Discussion, it goes here.