The bulk of this essay is your personal story of coming to the conclusion you need more data from your life. I don't mean to be overly harsh, but this isn't a particularly interesting story, and you don't tell it well. Further, you introduce a very negative tone (the way that you denigrate your tools rather than emphasizing how much you've done with so little is a representative example) that's very off-putting.

It seems like this work isn't very well-formed. Try thinking about some of the following questions:

• What questions are you trying to answer with this data?
• What conclusions have you reached from your data? Which of those did you expect? Which of those did you not expect? For example, you'd expect that increased steps correlates negatively with weight, but what else does it correlate to?
• What are some easy opportunities to collect data? For example, how easy is it to wear a pedometer versus take your blood pressure? What are the lowest-hanging fruit for potential quantifiers? ** What are the harder things to collect?
• What infrastructure is good for managing and processing data? ** You touch on this, but while it's almost the most interesting part of the whole piece, you devote the least space to it, and you don't analyze in depth.

I'd be interested in collaborating on this further, I have experience of my own in this area.