If I may offer some advice: Be careful not to rationalize social anxiety with "they are homogeneous, they dehumanize women, they aren't as original as I am, they bore me". That's externalizing an internal problem.
There are people of considerable intellectual caliber who have no qualms engaging in random small talk (a required skill in many career paths), and you'll only find out who they are once you get past that barrier.
No simple solution, but nosce te ipsum applies.
How should I distinguish between these types of people? Is there a way that doesn't require me making small talk with lots of people who I don't like?
If it's worth saying, but not worth its own post (even in Discussion), then it goes here.