I'm just saying, this seems to be one of the things that needs to be done. By me. By anyone who thinks they are too self-involved (and by anyone who doesn't think that but still IS too self-involved). ... It's what I'll do because I want to be less self-involved, and if anyone else wants to be less self-involved, I believe that this is an effective course of action and hope that they try it.

(By "this", I take it you are referring to "talking to other people" and "introducing yourself to people on planes" and so forth.)

So you think you need to be less self-involved. And doing so requires that you force your interaction on others.

That makes your hapless seat-neighbor on the plane your victim, a victim of your self-improvement strategy.

That's what the entire thing is about! It is your own problem if you have it, and this is a way that you can address it!

The point is that I don't think it's a problem and don't see any need to address it. Me missing out on the amazing contribution you might make to my life is not a problem for me. (I speak here in the general case; no personal judgment intended.)

Social norms are definitely written mostly by extraverts. The only way that's going to ever change is if somehow extraverts decide collectively to be less involved in socializing.. and introverts decide to be -more- involved in socializing.

Since that is, by definition, rather unlikely, extraverts have a moral obligation to consider the wishes of introverts to a much greater degree than they currently do, especially as far as making and enforcing social norms goes.

as far as I can see, there is no alternative that preserves the possibility of people being able to develop relationships beyond merely what is expected in their environment.

Why on earth are you talking as if this possibility is so obviously and uncontroversially a good thing?

I do understand that for introverts, essentially the thing that scares them the most is losing control over themselves, so they spend a lot of time honing that control

Uh... what.