I would guess that you're not a utilitarian and a lot of LWers are.
I'm almost certain this is false for the definition of "utilitarianism" you give in the next sentence.
There is unfortunately a lot of confusion between two different senses of the word "utilitarianism". The definition you give, and the more general sense of any morality system that uses a utility function.
I thought the latter was just called "consequentialism".
r/Fitness does a weekly "Moronic Monday", a judgment-free thread where people can ask questions that they would ordinarily feel embarrassed for not knowing the answer to. I thought this seemed like a useful thing to have here - after all, the concepts discussed on LessWrong are probably at least a little harder to grasp than those of weightlifting. Plus, I have a few stupid questions of my own, so it doesn't seem unreasonable that other people might as well.