But the thing is, this fic (on its surface) doesn't value kindness and morality nearly as much as suave, articulate word-poker and beautifully intricate schemes and counter-schemes

Harry says:

“Don’t worry, Headmaster,” said the boy. “I haven’t gotten my wires crossed. I know that I’m supposed to learn goodness from Hermione and Fawkes, not from Professor Quirrell and you.

You learn goodness from Hermione, and how to kill things efficiently from Quirrell. Who do you think is being valued here?

What the fic values above all else is a love and respect for life. Even the child who wants a sparkly throne and minions feels that way. Especially that child. All the various high powered smarty pantsing is entertainment and eye candy, not the core values of the fan fic. Not by a wide margin.

These "I'm offended" isms seem to be a very effective way to entirely miss the point of what someone else is saying, as you root about for the offensive kernel. It's a fine hobby. You need never fail; find a difference and spin it negatively. Ta da! I'm offended! Whee! What fun!

Maybe I should try it. I suppose I could get my undies in a bunch over the misandrism in HPMOR, since as even you say

the female characters are honest, and levelheaded, and moral,

Huff huff huff. Stomp stomp stomp. I'm so offended.

Hmmm, just didn't work for me. I'm not offended, and don't want to be. Instead of getting huffy about how wonderful Hermione is portrayed relative to males in the story, I'd rather just love the Hermione character even though she doesn't have the same genitalia that I do. Imagine that.

I think it's sad that people are trapped in this ideology, looking for ways to be offended, casting a pall over everything they see.