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PrometheanFaun comments on Yet more "stupid" questions - Less Wrong Discussion
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A gaydar doesn't have to depend on how gay a person looks superficially. There are plenty of other cues.
True, I should have used more general wording than "looks gay;" it would only be one component of the gaydar criteria. The problem is finding how to state it in not-loaded language. It would be impractical to use "matches stereotypically effeminate behavior."
"Stereotypically effeminate behavior" and "gay male behavior" are practically disjoint.