jsteinhardt comments on Open thread for January 1-7, 2014 - Less Wrong Discussion
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Question about a low-level social thing:
I've noticed that I have low priority in at mid-large group conversations. What I mean is that in situations where I'm one of two people talking, I'm (generally) the one who stops and the attention of the "audience" (people-who-aren't-speaking) is predominantly on the other person even before I stop speaking.
This used to cause me considerable distress, but no longer. I've accepted it as a fact of the social universe. But I'm still curious and would like to change it, if possible.
I suspect that this is something that varies by social group, and more strongly suspect that some behavior of mine is key.
I'm interested in (being pointed to) discussion of this type of thing, especially if it contains actionable advice.
I think body language tends to be pretty relevant here; it's possible you are not noticing the other person's body language indicating that they're about to start speaking. (And of course, if you want to have it be your turn to speak, using body language to signal this is also relevant.)