Open Thread February 25 - March 3

Scott Garrabrant

If it's worth saying, but not worth its own post (even in Discussion), then it goes here.

I wonder to what extent the problems you describe (divorces, conflict, etc) are caused mainly by poor matching of the people having the problems, and to what extent they are caused by the people having poor relationship (or other) skills, relatively regardless of how well matched they are with their partner?

Well, the success of arranged marriages in cultures that practice them suggests the "right match" isn't that important.

Why does it suggest that rather than that the arrangers are better at finding the "right match" than the persons to be married?

9Lumifer12y

What makes you think these marriages are successful? Low divorce rates are not good evidence in places where divorce is often impractical.

5Prismattic12y

I'm not sure this is correct. That is to say, the empirical point that divorce is much less common in arranged marriage cultures is obviously true. But a) I think there is some correlation between prevalence arranged marriage and stigma associated with divorce, meaning that not getting divorced does not necessarily equal happy marriage. b) The bar for success in 20th-21st century western marriages is set really high. It's not just an economic arrangement; people want a best friend and a passionate lover and maybe several other things rolled into one. When people in traditional cultures say that their marriages are "happy," they may well mean something much less than what affluent westerners would consider satisfactory.

13

Open Thread February 25 - March 3

13

If it's worth saying, but not worth its own post (even in Discussion), then it goes here.

13

13

Open Thread February 25 - March 3

13

If it's worth saying, but not worth its own post (even in Discussion), then it goes here.

13