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gwillen comments on What are you learning? - Less Wrong Discussion

13 Post author: Viliam_Bur 15 September 2014 10:50AM

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Comment author: gwillen 17 September 2014 12:00:04AM 2 points [-]

Wow, that is extremely helpful and thorough. Thank you very much for the time you spent writing that.

one ongoing long-term relationship and one ongoing intermittent play partner

Can I infer poly from that? I would expect that would reduce the field quite a bit, and introduce a lot of complications into the process, if that were the case while one was looking on OKC. (There's a Chrome extension to highlight people's answers to a handful of poly-compatibility questions; I found the hit rate for positive answers to be middling.)

Comment author: sixes_and_sevens 17 September 2014 09:58:12AM 5 points [-]

"Monogamish" is probably a better description. My girlfriend and I are ostensibly polyamorous, but mostly we're just busy.

A significant proportion of my OKCupid matches were polyvangelists back when I was still quite skeptical of it. A couple of years ago I went to a "99% Party", where the two hosts (themselves 99% matches) invited all their 99% OKC matches, and each guest was allowed to bring a 99%-matching plus-one. That was a surreal experience. There was obviously some selection for extroversion and people who could turn up to a stranger's house in Islington on a week night, but I learned that my OKCupid matching-space neighbours were a lot more pro-poly, soapbox left-wing and literary than I was.