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polymathwannabe comments on What level of compassion do you consider normal, expected, mandatory etc. ? - Less Wrong Discussion
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Tit-for-tat makes sense. Preemptive tit-for-tat is unnecessarily aggressive.
Co-operate as default if you don't have a good read on whether the other person is co-operative is included in my suggestion, is that not enough for it to feel non-aggressive to you? Tit-for-tat, with co-operate first turn. If they come in at you sufficiently rudely without giving a chance for a reasonable request, you can take that as them playing defect preemptively.
And it's not specifically expected reciprocation I'd look for, but whether the person would be as helpful to a person in general if they were on the other side of the situation.
What if your estimate of other person's defection is 90%? 95%? 99%? What if he explicitly stated that he won't cooperate? What if you are Omega, and can make the prediction with 100% accuracy?
In general the problem with Tit-for-tat is that it requires repeated interactions with the same person. In the neighbor example, that's not necessarily a problem.
Of course that raises the question of what previous interactions with the neighbor were like something the OP hasn't specified, e.g., does he have a history of making unreasonable demands of the other members of the apartment? Has he been otherwise a nice guy?