Not knowing what I want. I like and dislike to socialize at the same time. I like the idea of socializing. I just don't like people, usually. I would like being the kind of person who likes it.

I sense that You don't get to know what you're fighting for might be a relevant read.

I think that "like socializing" might be a dangling node. For me...

• I often get some sort of "superficial enjoyment" from socializing.
• Sometimes I don't get that enjoyment and I'm bored.
• I'm usually frustrated with people for being stupid when I'm socializing.
• Sometimes I'm frustrated that I can't talk about more serious and interesting things.
• Sometimes I feel "empty" because I can't have "real" conversations with people in person.

So these are all just descriptions of reality. Whether or not that makes the label "someone who likes socializing" apply to me, idk. But once you know the facts, asking that question is just a matter of semantics.