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MrMind comments on Open Thread, Jul. 27 - Aug 02, 2015 - Less Wrong Discussion
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I am having a crisis in my life of trying to ask people a particular question and have them try to answer a different question. Its painful. I just want to yell at people; "answer the question I asked! not the one you felt like answering that was similar to the one I asked because you thought that was what I wanted to hear about or ask about!".
This has happened recently for multiple questions in my life that I have tried to ask people about. Do you have suggestions for either: a. dealing with it b. getting people to answer the right question
Assuming there isn't something wrong with the question I originally ask and how I present it.
Aren't you blocking, with this assumption, all the parameters you can intervene on to improve your communication?
As for dealing with it, you can try to see it this way: every time you ask a precise question with very stringent constraints, you are basically asking people to solve a difficult problem for you. You are, in a sense, freeloading on others' brainpower.
As with everything, this is a scarce resource, one that you cannot really expect people to give to you freely.
Learn to accept that we are animals constantly doing cost-analysis, and so if you notice a question not being answered the way you want to, it's probably because of this, and you need to supply a more adequate reward.
yes. Because I don't want those answers right now. They help to answer a different question. one I am not asking this time.
Explicitly that statement was included because I didn't want 101 answers that look like, "maybe you should find ways to ask clearer". Because that's not the problem or strategy I am trying to use to attack the puzzle right now.
Your model does help.
I have specific concern about the culture of answering questions in this way and the way it is not-productive at answering things. I noticed myself doing the thing and managed to untrain it, or train different strategies to answer that are helpful instead; I am looking for a method of sharing the policy of "answer the face value question +/- answer the question that is asked specifically first before trying to answer the question you think they want you to ask". Any suggestions?
I feel that
and
are contradictory requirements.
What am I missing?