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ChristianKl comments on Subjective vs. normative offensiveness - Less Wrong Discussion

2 Post author: casebash 25 September 2015 04:10AM

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Comment author: VoiceOfRa 28 September 2015 02:14:16AM 1 point [-]

No, it's not. If you get repeatibly the result that you creep out woman then you are by definition bad at reading the signals that lead up to doing something that creeps out the woman.

So your actual rule is, "people who are bad at reading subtle signals should never ask women out"?

You calibrate your results based on empiric reality and not on what you read online about what certain signals mean.

If there existed signals that were reliable indicators, you'd expect numerous people to have posted them online. The fact that you have to explicitly disclaim them is evidence that such signals don't really exist, or are unreliable. Here's another theory, a woman freaking out has more to do with how you ask and who's doing the asking, specifically whether you are perceived as a high status "alpha", a low status "gamma", or somewhere in between. In particular "If you frequently freak out woman with asking them out then you reduce the intensity of what you ask women" is horrible advise since it will make you be perceived as lower status.

Comment author: ChristianKl 30 September 2015 12:54:20PM 0 points [-]

If there existed signals that were reliable indicators, you'd expect numerous people to have posted them online.

Only if the signals could be written down in a straightforward way. Any article would give you system II knowledge while the important skill is a system I skill.

Comment author: VoiceOfRa 01 October 2015 03:13:41AM 1 point [-]

And yet, you're sure that the signals exist and they're reliable indicators.

Comment author: ChristianKl 01 October 2015 08:04:25AM -1 points [-]

Quite a lot of signal reading I do on a daily basis are system one skills.

It's quite hard to give someone a step by step process to feel his own heartbeat. At the same time it's an ability that you can reliably develop if you spend enough time meditating.