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gjm comments on Request for advice: high school transferring - Less Wrong Discussion
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Comments (33)
What are your university plans? The more interested you are in going to a highly selective university or studying something very challenging there, the more valuable the academic strength of your current school.
Do you think the "outstanding" academics at your current school mean that you would actually learn more there than at the public school, or only that you would be better credentialled or something of the kind?
My impression is that later in life many people remain in touch with their friends from university and rather few with their friends from high school. If I'm right about this, the social advantages of the public school are shortish-term only. (That doesn't make them unimportant.)
Do you have a strong sense of how friendly the other people at the public school would be to someone newly arrived from a fancy independent school? That seems like something that could be a source of tension (e.g., they may expect you to think you're better than they are, somehow, which can cause trouble even if you have no such attitude).
Is there anyone else who has a say in where you go? (Parents, legal guardians, ...) If so, what do they think, and what do you think about what they think?
Does that hold true now that we have magical facebook?
As someone who uses facebook a lot and has many far-away friends from sleep away camp, it seems like it only forces you to keep in touch if you want to be.
I don't facebook alone creates strong social connections. I'm facebook friends with a lot of the people from my school by I have little to do with them in my daily life.
It was more about ease-of-access to people you wouldn't keep in contact with. Facebook just makes it much easier.
Good point nonetheless.
I have no idea. I would generally expect people to have more in common with others they meet at university than with others they meet in high school (more segregation by ability via university choice; more segregation by interests via subject choice) and to choose friends who are more likely to remain a good match in terms of personality, interests, etc. (people can change a lot between, say, age 16 and age 20) -- it's not just a matter of it being easier to lose touch with your high-school friends than with your university friends.
The academics, in terms of signalling, are fantastic, but in terms of actual learning they are only okay. Theoretically they are fantastic in terms of actual learning too, but there are many bad teachers, and because the classes are heavily discussion based the learning is largely a function of the intelligence of your classmates, and my school is not selective enough for that to be taken care of. (They even have the gall to ban honors-level English and History classes for underclassmen, so I learn just about nothing in those...)
I'm still friends with several kids at the public school. They are very, very nice, and there are enough wealthy kids in my town that no one really cares about that. Also, they know I could only afford it because my mom works there, so they don't chalk me off as "snobby rich kid" (many of them are richer than me!)
My parents don't care at all. The only authority exerted in them in this area is that they won't let me unschool (which is something I really wanted to do for a while but probably don't have the self-discipline for
I don't expect to keep my high school friends, but if I'm happier from their friendship it will be easier for me to study and get good grades (I know this from experience).