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kalla724 comments on Calibrate your self-assessments - LessWrong
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I've noticed that I have a particular form of calibration problem, for which I don't know if there is a specific term. Tentatively, I'm calling it "pernicious sliding selective self-assessment."
What I mean by this is that all of my achievements become diminished in my own eyes, because my frame of reference for comparison gradually excludes people who haven't reached at least an equal level of achievement:
-- When I started working out, I gradually came to ignore the 80% (or whatever it is) of the population that is sedentary and could only compare myself to the people I see at the gym, a disproportionate number of whom make me look weak by comparison.
-- Similarly, when I took up a martial art, I ended up comparing myself not to the population as a whole, but to the more advanced practitioners, thus feeling incompetent.
-- I have a lot of academic accomplishments, including a degree summa cum laude from a competitive university and a Fulbright fellowship. Yet I suffer horribly from imposter syndrome, in part because my frame of reference for comparison gradually weans out anyone who isn't also academically accomplished.
Unfortunately, the fact that I am aware this is happening doesn't seem to help overcome it.
This is a VERY common form of anxiety. The good thing is, it is fairly well understood, and in vast majority of cases, the problem responds really, really well to CBT interventions. I'm familiar with cases where a dozen sessions (and a willing commitment to overcoming the issue) completely and permanently solved the problem. Have you tried something like that?
In case you haven't, I highly recommend it. Even if you don't want/can't afford treatment right now, you could try basic CBT on your own (keeping thought records can be particularly helpful). It is likely to be less effective than guided therapy, but it is certainly cheaper.