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NancyLebovitz comments on LW Women- Minimizing the Inferential Distance - LessWrong
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From the linked article
I'd like to ask, would speaking up and intervening be an appreciated behavior? When I envision this scenario, I see this as likely to incite further discomfort, for "white knighting." I'd like to know what sort of responses people who've been subject to catcalling would like to see from other men who happen to be present.
Helping people is a complicated matter, and I don't think it's just a male-female issue.
If someone is extremely conflict-averse, then the offer of help might be unwelcome because it's likely to lead to more conflict in the short run.
Needing to be helped can be seen as having one's status lowered even further than it was lowered by the initial attack/insult.
And on the other hand, sometimes help works. Sometimes it's welcome. Sometimes the lack of offers of help is seen as a betrayal.
I don't have general principles for telling when help is welcome, though asking the person whether they want help isn't a bad idea if it's a slow-moving situation. I also suspect that there are subtleties of body language which affect whether help will be welcomed.