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scav comments on Don't Get Offended - LessWrong
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Agreed and voted up. Of course, you don't get a choice about whether to have an emotion, at the base level.
Not sure "offended" is a primary emotion though. It seems to me (by introspection) to be bundled together with a lot of culture-dependent and habitual behaviours, associations and memes, all of which are sub-optimal for any given situation, and could do with being brought under conscious control before being allowed to influence my actions.
I get a choice about whether and how I experience emotions, in the same sense as I get a choice as to whether and how I run marathons. That is, I can't decide right now to run a marathon, or to not feel anger, but I can make choices that will reliably eventually get me there. What I'm saying isn't that the latter is impossible, but rather that I don't endorse doing it.
I agree that offense is bundled together with and mediated by lots of culture-dependent and habitual stuff. I would say the same about a lot of emotional patterns. And yes, some (though not all) of that stuff is suboptimal for any given situation.
And yes, the ability to choose how I act even when emotional or otherwise experiencing influences on my behavior is valuable.
I agree that offense is not a primary emotion, if I understand what you mean by the term.