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BrienneYudkowsky comments on A map of Bay Area memespace - LessWrong
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Even straight vanilla mono can be part of kink culture. Especially when described in those words. Subcultures come as much from how people are doing things as what it is they're doing.
If someone says "Hi, I'm Sandy, I'm bi-poly-switch," and you can say, "Nice to meet you, Sandy! I'm Chris, I'm straight-mono-vanilla," you may not have compatible bits set, but you're ① speaking the same dialect, ② in a social context where that dialect can be spoken, ③ and not running away. That's an okay start for a subcultural connection.