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TheAncientGeek comments on According to Dale Carnegie, You Can't Win an Argument—and He Has a Point - LessWrong
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I think you need a longer time span to see this is quite often false. What has happened many times is I argue with my friend or my parent and "win" while they're defending their position to the teeth. Months later, they present my argument to me as their own as if the previous discussion never happened. Some people's forgetfulness amazes me, but I suspect I've changed my mind this way without noticing too.
Admitting you're wrong is quite different from changing your mind. Even so, I hopefully don't argue to win these days anymore.
Are you sure it's forgetfullness? if someone is after status, it is instrumentally rational to never admit to updating, and it is also instrumentally rational to update to better arguments. They are exercising a rational have-your-cake-and-eat-it strategy.
Why not both? (in which unintentional selective forgetfulness causes optimal status seeking behavior)
Evolution makes creatures which are instrumentally rational to some extent, but they don't necessarily need to be instrumentally rational on purpose.