Last month I finally succeeded in doing active listening. Really active listening with almost all the bells and whistles. Not interrupting. Accepting to be interrupted. Emphatic responses. Mirroring posture and gestures.

It was in two instances so far that I really was in the flow with it. In these cases it did lead to great results. Sure things can always be improved but I'm proud of it nonetheless. In all these years the many times before I tried it something was always missing or it fell to pieces too quickly.

I think the key it does work for me now is that I understand the process better and in more detail. I can reflect it during the process. I really perform better in most things if I first build a complex intuitive model of what to do beforehand. The knowledge and experience accumulated and finally passed the critical level. Significant part had the books I read about it - and did the exercises. The Charisma Myth being the last but not the least (it has lots of exercises).