The Fatal Gift of Beauty: The Trials of Amanda Knox

1 FrF 05 September 2011 05:07PM

Charles Petzold writes about Nina Burleigh's "The Fatal Gift of Beauty: The Trials of Amanda Knox".

Comment author: lukeprog 11 May 2011 06:58:16PM *  3 points [-]

An aside on 'kino escalation'...

The term seems to have been invented by a 'pickup artist' (probably Mystery) because they didn't bother to look up the standard term for communication with touch: haptic communication or 'haptics.'

In the seduction community, 'kino' is short for 'kinesthetics', but unfortunately for the pickup community, kinesthetics is the study of the inner awareness of movement (similar to proprioception), not the study of communication with touch.

Comment author: FrF 11 May 2011 08:38:12PM 0 points [-]

"As an aside" re: Mystery -- I admit to being fascinated with his contribution to a Neil Strauss seminar. (It distills Mystery's theories as found in his own book and in Strauss' bestseller.) Mystery's a skilled didactitian although I remember that when I watched the video a second time a couple of his points did lose a bit of their persuasiveness. The PU literature also shows how deeply Evolutionary Psychology has penetrated the popular consciousness, albeit with at least some degree of -- pun intended in this case -- vulgarizations. For those of you who are interested, the video I'm referring to can be found at YouTube with the following search: "Mystery Neil's Annihilation Method DVD".

Comment author: AdeleneDawner 03 May 2011 05:55:02AM *  13 points [-]

I can flip that around; my parents both work, so I don't have to answer to them during standard work hours.

... so long as you stick to things that can be hidden from them, which is a pretty major limitation.

ETA: Also, this situation requires that you keep their preferences in mind, which may be significantly detrimental even if you're generally able to work around them. Not carrying that particular cognitive burden seems likely to be a significant part of it, and with a regular job and boss, you only have to carry that burden during set hours and don't have to worry about it the rest of the time.

What if you want even more flexibility than that from your "job"? I don't know of too many ways to earn income where you don't have to commit to some specific schedule in advance and can also take unpaid vacations at will, without notice - and those that I do know of (fiction writing, online poker, day trading) aren't ones that I think that I can make a living at. :(

They do exist, they're just rare and hard to find. (I have one, but I don't know how to find another.) Or you could do temp work. Or, you could change your definition of 'make a living' - I wanted to run this by Alicorn before I mentioned it, but once we're moved and settled in at the house I'm working on buying (which has hit a bit of a roadblock but should happen within 6 months), we'd be willing to have you visit for a month with an eye to figuring out whether the arrangement would work out long-term. You'd need to have enough income to cover food in the long term - probably about $200/month; cost of living is pretty nice here - and any other spending you wanted to do (notable: I have no interest in TV, so if you want cable you'll have to cover that; hulu seems to be a reasonable substitute tho), but you wouldn't need to pay rent if you were willing to pitch in by driving us places.

(If Crono isn't interested in this, or moves on, we may consider opening the offer up to other LWers, with a preference for those in similar need of being kicked out of a rut and likely to be amenable to an autistic-friendly lifestyle.)

Comment author: FrF 03 May 2011 07:12:20PM *  3 points [-]

I had to smile because of Adelene's offer. This is a great idea! The ETA from above also made me aware that the lifestyle advice on Less Wrong is quite unique in its sophistication.

Comment author: lukeprog 18 January 2011 01:49:08AM 3 points [-]

Rather phenomenal Amazon reviews you have, sir.

Comment author: FrF 18 January 2011 02:41:14AM *  2 points [-]

I remember the interview Josh did with Ben Casnocha as being very interesting. (Site contains links to streaming video and MP3 download + written interview summary.)

Comment author: CronoDAS 09 September 2010 08:39:17PM *  1 point [-]

The most immediate change I probably need to make is "get an income". It's a prerequisite for most other changes I'd want to make.

(My mom's MS is unusual, because she started showing symptoms late in life, only a few years ago.)

Comment author: FrF 09 September 2010 09:52:08PM *  4 points [-]

Then your mom is lucky in more than one regard! Because of medical progress it is very different to be diagnosed with MS today than it was in 1973, when my mother had her first MS episode at the age of 27.

You wrote earlier that a lot of what you don't like about your life is simply due to habits. Personally, I find the key to change is to persistently chip away at my mountain of bad habits (my main nemesis is procrastination) and to think more from day to day, to try to implement some (any!) positive difference in my life at a daily basis, and be it only to show a friendly face when you're not really feeling like it, or to do that one more household chore you try to avoid, or to confront another uncomfortable truth about yourself and verbalize it to (well-chosen!) friends and acquaintances.

I know, these strategies are so basic they almost don't qualify for Self-Help 101 but once you "really want to change" I found they work quite well.

Comment author: wnoise 09 September 2010 04:56:08PM *  6 points [-]

Why do you think the term "village idiot" is "gravely anachronistic"? It's part of an idiom. "Idiot" was briefly used as a quasi-scientific label for certain range of IQs, and that usage is certainly anachronistic, but "idiot" had meaning before that, and continues to. The same is true for "village idiot".

Comment author: FrF 09 September 2010 06:25:15PM *  6 points [-]

You're right, wnoise, "village idiot" is part of an idiom but one I don't like at all and I don't think I'm particular in this regard.

I should have put my objection as "'Village idiot' is gravely anachronistic unless you want to be insensitive by subsuming a plethora of medical conditions and social determinants under a dated, derogatory term for mentally disabled people."

This may sound like nit-picking but obviously said intelligence graph is an important item in SIAI's symbolic tool kit and therefore every detail should be right. When I see the graph, I'm always thinking: Please, "for the love of cute kittens", change the "village idiot"!

Comment author: timtyler 08 September 2010 12:51:58PM *  6 points [-]
Comment author: FrF 09 September 2010 04:25:26PM *  1 point [-]

With all respect to Eliezer I think nowadays the gravely anachronistic term "village idiot" shouldn't be used anymore. I wanted to say that almost every time when I see the intelligence scale graphic in his talks.

Comment author: CronoDAS 09 September 2010 06:42:50AM *  11 points [-]

I have been getting blood work; everything always comes out just fine. (Yes, thyroid hormone is one of the things that's been checked.) And none of the many doctors I've been dragged to have told me to take vitamins, although my psychiatrist has occasionally asked about my diet. There are multivitamins in my house, but I stopped taking them a long time ago because they're these really annoying, very large chewable tablets the size of quarters.

In terms of vitamin deficiency, I'm actually most suspicious of vitamin B12. Both my maternal grandmother and my mother have low levels and get B12 injections regularly. (My mom is currently 60.) I once asked my psychiatrist to have my B12 checked, but I don't think it actually has been.

Also, the basic effect of my antidepressants has been "Well, I am more cheerful now, but my life still sucks every bit as much as it did when I wasn't taking them." I'll quote a doctor's anecdote:

“I remember one patient who came in and said she needed to reduce her dosage,” he says. “I asked her if the antidepressants were working, and she said something I’ll never forget. ‘Yes, they’re working great,’ she told me. ‘I feel so much better. But I’m still married to the same alcoholic son of a bitch. It’s just now he’s tolerable.’ ”

Perhaps the difference between me on antidepressants and me off antidepressants is that, while on antidepressants, I was willing to go do my homework even though I'd rather touch a hot stove than do another problem set, while when off them, no amount of social pressure from my parents and other authority figures could make me open up my textbook and get to work, because I just couldn't make myself do it no matter what happened.

Right now, I'm not necessarily depressed because I have screwed up brain chemicals. I'm depressed because I'm a 28-year-old lazy bum who doesn't think he'll ever be able to get a job he can stand and keep it for any length of time, is supported by (and lives with) his parents, doesn't have any close friends, has never been in a romantic relationship, lives in fear of having his parents decide to stop supporting him, is endlessly frustrated by his mother's (completely justified) demands that he help her with various tasks because she has MS and can barely walk, and doesn't have any particular goals in life other than "escape it".

I think I can't cope with being my mother's caretaker any more; I need to get an income and get the hell away from my parents, but I don't think I can do that, so I just stay where I am and put up with the same shit that's been making me miserable for the past eight or so years. (Before then, I was often miserable, but for different reasons.)

Comment author: FrF 09 September 2010 03:25:54PM *  5 points [-]

Hello CronoDAS,

You're story sounds somewhat similar to mine (but I'm considerably older than you). My mother had Multiple Sklerosis, too; I was her main caretaker until her death. It's strange that it didn't dawn on me how much my upbringing and my mother's illness has shaped my father's and my life - and furthermore I didn't really understand until recently how unusually withdrawn my life has been so far. Now, social isolation is a well-known danger when you're severely ill but I was (at least on a physical level) healthy and still I wasn't able to break out of the habits that I (to a certain degree) adopted because of my former circumstances and a general inclination towards shyness.

I have a very unoriginal proposition for you: Act as soon as possible and change your situation! Believe me, things don't get easier once you're ten years older than you are now. What about a "trial move"? The way you describe your parents I think you could always return if for one reason or another you can't cope with being "on your own".

I'm "in the process" (as vaguely as that may sound) to finally get my act together and make some serious, so-long-overdue-you-won't-believe-it life changes. I know some of the depressive symptoms you're describing: A general world-weariness, an enmity to my own body, avoidance of "boring" errands up to a point where it got seriously damaging, seeing no sense in dragging this carcass of mine through a pointless world etc pp. But somehow things begin to click for me a bit more. If it's "meant to be" that I'm going down, then at least I'm putting up a fight (i.e. trying to beat some amount of rationality into my skull which is thick with irrational believes and blocks)!

Take care!

Comment author: FAWS 05 March 2010 09:16:09PM *  0 points [-]

I personally don't really care about spoilers, and having read the story now the passage you quote doesn't seem all that terribly spoilerish to me anyway, but you should note that spoiler protection has been enforced for "spoilers" considerably less spoilerish than that around here.

Comment author: FrF 05 March 2010 09:43:28PM 0 points [-]

I completely forget about spoilers! I used this particular quotation because I innocently thought it would be a "hook" to motivate people to read the story.

Should I rot13 the quotation for reasons of precaution?

Comment author: FrF 05 March 2010 08:49:45PM *  0 points [-]

The Final Now, a new short story by Gregory Benford about (literally) End Times.

Quotation in rot13 for the spoiler-averse's sake. It's an interesting passage and, as FAWS, I also think it's not that revealing, so it's probably safe to read it in advance.

("Bar" vf n cbfg-uhzna fgnaq-va sbe uhznavgl juvpu nqqerffrf n qrzvhetr ragvgl, qrfvtangrq nf "Ur" naq "Fur".)

"Bar synerq jvgu ntvgngrq raretvrf. “Vs lbh unq qrfvtarq gur havirefr gb er-pbyyncfr, gurer pbhyq unir orra vasvavgr fvzhyngrq nsgreyvsr. Gur nfxrj pbzcerffvba pbhyq shry gur raretl sbe fhpu pbzchgngvba—nyy fdhrrmrq jvguva gung svany ren!”

“Gung jnf n yrff vagrerfgvat pubvpr,” Fur fnvq. “Jr pubfr guvf havirefr sbe vgf tenaq inevrgl. Infgre ol sne fvapr vg unf ynfgrq fb ybat.”

“Inevrgl jnf bhe tbny—gb znxr gur zbfg fgvzhyngvat fcnpr-gvzr jr pbhyq,” Ur fnvq, “Lbh, fznyy Bar, frrz gb uneobe gjva qrfverf—checbfr naq abirygl—naq fb cebterff.”

Bar fnvq, “Bs pbhefr!” Gura, fulyl, “. . . naq ynfgvat sbe rgreavgl.”

Fur fnvq, “Gubfr pbagenqvpg.”"

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