Took it. Note for people on iOS device--iqtest.dk requires Flash, and doesn't tell you what's wrong if you load it on an iPhone /iPad/iPod.

First of all, great story! I’ll definitely be adding it to my list of things to recommend to people I’m already recommending HPMOR to.

The only problem I had with the writing was that some of the expository dialogue seemed a bit too LW-technical, particularly if you’re trying to appeal to bronys first and rationalist second. I have neither a solution nor any specific lines to hand, but David teaching Butterscotch game theory, or CelestAI lecturing Lars on biases, are some of the scenes I’m thinking of.

BTW, I’d recommend trying to get a little more mileage out of the “CelestAI” thing—it would make a great way to remember what’s so awesome out of the story. You shouldn’t necessarily use it every single time you mention her, but maybe you could work it in somehow…

This is quite good. I like how you managed to make the ponytopia both extremely attractive and more than a little creepy at the same time. I feel like you presented the situation without trying to argue it was either good or bad, leaving that decision to the reader, and I quite like that approach.

From a storytelling perspective, I only had two real complaints. One is your beginning. There's no conflict until halfway through the first chapter, when Lars and Hanna start arguing. You do a good job setting up the premise before then, but it still makes for a slow start, and I can easily imagine myself recommending this to people with a "no, really, it gets better, stick with it" disclaimer. The second is that there are lengthy stretches where the story consists only of talking heads, with no action or movement. Chapter 4 was the most notable example.

I also found myself wondering about the ethics of creating a sentient being like Butterscotch tailored specifically to the desires of someone else (assuming they weren't lying about her sentience; I don't know how you'd test that). I realize you can't fit everything into the story, but I thought that might have been a cool topic. You made me think about the ethics in ways you didn't directly discuss, so you're clearly doing something right.

Grammar note: the possessive form of "Light Sparks" is "Light Sparks's," since his name is a singular noun.

Wonderful job with the MMO aspects of life in Equestria. After the "what the literal fuck" line, I had to step away from the computer for a minute to savor it before I could keep reading.

If/when you submit this to Equestria Daily, feel free to let me know. I'm one of the prereaders, and while I wouldn't feel comfortable judging something I feel this philosophically invested in, I'd at least try to make sure it didn't get discarded for lack of pony in the very beginning. (We receive, and reject, a fair number of stories that are about bronies rather than ponies. This is a borderline case, but the pony content increases as the story progresses, and I can tell people to look at the post-uploading chapters before deciding.)

Thank you very much for your feedback.

Sigh. "Alicorn" is supposed to mean just the unicorn horn, not an entire winged unicorn / pegacorn / unisus. It's been corrupted; I guess you don't really have a good alternative on how to refer to the species with a single word, but if you're only saying it once or twice "winged unicorn" is serviceable.

I am actually aware of this and the first several drafts stubbornly referred to Princess Celestia as a winged unicorn. I gave up after having a discussion with my roomate about how we write to be understood by others, and, at least in the minds of my target readers, the correct word to refer to the concept of a winged unicorn is "alicorn."

Interesting; thanks.

Also, do you know if Capgras delusion only wipes away all previous emotions you associated with faces, or if it also makes it impossible to form new emotions related to other faces? What if, for some reason, the spouse decided to go along with the charade that they were a different person, and managed to convince the Capgras patient to stay married to them anyway? Would the patient eventually form an emotional connection the way normal people do when they meet, date, and marry someone? Or if a Capgras patient had a child after the brain damage, would they associate their child's face with emotions while still considering their spouse and parents to be imposters?

I'm mystified as to how to shave smoothly without cutting myself and without razor burn. I've never been able to accomplish all three of these in one shave. (This is facial shaving I'm speaking of, as I am male). Not shaving is not an option, as I quickly develop a distinctly unfashionable neck-beard whenever I neglect shaving.

Update, one year later: I can report that shaving during a warm shower with no shaving cream has increased the smoothness of my shaves, has drastically reduced shaving cuts and has eliminated razor burn almost entirely. Thanks, Less Wrong!