All of Aaron Boke's Comments + Replies

I have some advice on the "how": 
It is unfortunately common to learn self-injurious patterns. And if you do, it will not necessarily seem odd or extreme to you. Take a few minutes to seriously consider if you regularly do something that hurts or harms you- Do you do exercises that hurt? Do you deny yourself food when hungry? Do you force yourself to work past the point of exhaustion? Do you call yourself names?

How would you naturally feel about someone that did those things to you? Probably not great. If you're finding it hard to feel positively about... (read more)

I had been trying to use "positive self talk" for years, but still found that I was extremely harsh to myself.

For me, talk wasn't enough. Pairing the talk with physical acts of kindness dramatically improved my self-talk, efficacy, mental stability, and overall sense of well-being.

My methodology looks like this- whenever I do something for myself (even mundane daily tasks like making lunch) I consciously "give" myself the nice thing, saying something kind or reassuring while doing it (ie "I made this for you because I like you", "I put the warmer blanket o... (read more)