Back when my co-parent & I were navigating these decisions 6-10 years ago, we came across a study that really shaped our thinking: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4077166/. Basically, the researchers analyzed outcomes in families where the siblings were breastfeeding-discordant. The punchline: "Once we restrict analyses to siblings and incorporate within-family fixed effects, estimates of the association between breastfeeding and all but one indicator of child health and wellbeing dramatically decrease and fail to maintain statistical sign...
YES! These points are tremendously overlooked. Breastfeeding was a major psychological issue for my partner for these reasons, as well as some others that might have been a bit personal or idiosyncratic. Either way, it's not AT ALL a zero-cost choice.