I don't think that neurotypicality is incapacitating in general, only for me and other people who didn't acquire neurotypical social skills for whatever reason. It cost me a lot of effort to participate in those communities because I was effectively trying to speak a foreign language, and I'd only just started to learn how at the time.

One of them appears to have died. Here's(I would recommend just skimming the first 5 pages or so to get a feel for it) a forum thread I was reading recently. I haven't participated but the tone in there strikes me as simultaneously extremely polite and quite focussed on the subject at hand.