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ThrustVectoring comments on LW Women Entries- Creepiness - Less Wrong
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In general people believe in explanations that involve them more than ones that don't involve them. "X doesn't like talking to people" is the x-is-shy explanation, while "X doesn't like talking to me" is the x-is-aloof explanation.
Huh. I've never thought about it in that way before, but I feel sure you're right.