I would replace "thought you were kinda cute" with "thought you were really cool/interesting", OkCupid's data shows that women respond negatively to physical compliments.
I've never really tried using Facebook even though I have an active account with a good variety of people. I guess I don't think that "we went to the same middle school together" is a better criterion for a match than "your profile shows we have a ton of things in common". Also, if someone's on a dating site you know that they're actively looking, and the pool is much bigger.
If you are reaching out on FB to someone you're really into, I would recommend again writing about a unique interest ('Hey, I saw your dancing picture, is that Argentinian Tango?') and not appearance. I assume that good looking women on FB get unsolicited messages a lot, you always want to start a conversation and show that you looked at more than their pretty face.
I might be overextending here but what would you say if I think OKC stuff is specific to OKC (and online dating sites specifically) and could not apply to other places?
Also, does OKC define "physical compliments" more precisely? My real life experience says otherwise, and there's also the question of why women wouldn't like their appearance to be appreciated despite spending a non-minor amount of their time on it.
There's a lot of data and research on what makes people successful at online dating, but I don't know anyone who actually tried to wholeheartedly apply this to themselves. I decided to be that person: I implemented lessons from data, economics, game theory and of course rationality in my profile and strategy and OkCupid. Shockingly, it worked! I got a lot of great dates, learned a ton and found the love of my life. I didn't expect dating to be my "rationalist win", but it happened.
Here's the first part of the story, I hope you'll find some useful tips and maybe a dollop of inspiration among all the silly jokes.
P.S.
Does anyone know who curates the "Latest on rationality blogs" toolbar? What are the requirements to be included?