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HughRistik comments on Interpersonal Entanglement - Less Wrong

43 Post author: Eliezer_Yudkowsky 20 January 2009 06:17AM

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Comment author: HughRistik 28 January 2009 06:36:03AM 2 points [-]

Eliezer, I've been pondering reconciliation between male and female sex/relationship preferences for a while, so I really like this line of thought:

Eliezer said:

The male shadows and the female shadows are pretty much agreed that (real) men need to be able to better read female minds; but since this is a satisfaction of a relatively more "female" desire - making men more what women wish they were - the male shadows ask in return that the sex-drive mismatch be handled more by increasing the female sex drive, and less by decreasing male desire...

This is what pickup artists in the seduction community are doing: getting better at reading women's minds (through evolutionary psychology and pseudo-empirical observation/testing), and attracting women such that women's sexual interest is aroused. When you have studied pickup, you realize that a large amount of the gap between male and female desires is due to societally-enforced incompetence with the opposite sex, on the part of both sexes. Of course, male pickup artists are stacking the deck in their direction, according to male-typical relationship preferences (which include relationships, but which are stacking in the casual direction a bit more than female-typical preferences). Hopefully, a counterpart to male pickup will become available to women which will give women a level of insight into male sexual psychology similar to what pickup artists have into female sexual psychology (not that many women don't already have this type of savvy).

Once the opposite sex's preferences and behaviors stop looking so black-boxy, I think there will be greater potential for harmony between the sexes.

Comment author: Articulator 13 June 2013 09:52:00PM 0 points [-]

To be honest, I really don't see men being anywhere near as complex as women. I fully admit that I'm biased, but I honestly believe that men have simpler drives in relationships, and are far more open, especially collectively, as as to what those drives are.