= 27d567bc2d48d9f40e9ccc20ea370b15)
Phlebas comments on Improving My Writing Style - Less Wrong Discussion
You are viewing a comment permalink. View the original post to see all comments and the full post content.
= 783df68a0f980790206b9ea87794c5b6)
Loading…= b715d02e85f7b3b4ae65ca3d3e450868)
Subscribe to RSS Feed
Powered by Reddit
= f037147d6e6c911a85753b9abdedda8d)
You are viewing a comment permalink. View the original post to see all comments and the full post content.
Comments (33)
"Dull to read" is a subjective evaluation I don't share. Moreover, it is exactly the sort of justification which is given (1) to arbitrary norms. When people are told (2) that they shouldn't do X, they easily convince themselves that X feels dull, even if there wouldn't be such a feeling without the (arbitrary) social norm. I don't know for certain whether this is the case of the passive voice, but I am generally skeptical about subjective justifications of existing norms.
As for obscuring reality and the Orwell's essay, see Vladimir_M's comment and the links included therein. One of the more interesting points is that the critics of passive voice generally don't use passive voice less often than the rest of the writers. Maybe I have been careful in this comment and thus am not entirely fair, but I have used passive constructions twice (numbered above) in positions where the active alternative would be much longer, while in the parent comment you have put three instances of passive voice ("justifications are attached", "link is explained", "mention is thrown"; two of them only to spare a short personal pronoun "I").
"Metaphysics of metaethics" is indeed confusing for me, but I usually don't understand anything containing the word "metaphysics", so I am not sure whether the alternative is any better. I agree with your objection to "shocking" and, to a lesser extent, "dissent". No problem with "needless to say".
Upvoted for precise thinking.
I agree that part of the problem with "if it can be known" is that "if it be known" is strictly superior.
On the other hand, an important fact in the critic's argument is that the consequentialist agent knows that strategy Y leads to horrible consequence Z. If he is simply unaware of this fact (but "it be known" by other people), then we would be entirely unsurprised to see him choose strategy Y - he is still a consequentialist, just a misinformed one - so no argument materialises.
Therefore I think that the use of active voice is clearer in this instance, because passive voice obscures the distinction between our knowing that strategy Y leads to horrible consequence Z, and the hypothetical consequentialist in question knowing this. Admittedly this distinction is not difficult to infer in the original piece, but numerous small inclarities can add up to make tedious prose.
On reflection, what you have said about the passive voice in general is true. Misuse of the passive voice to obscure agency when agency is politically or socially important is Orwellian; passive voice in general does not necessarily obscure anything.