Digital personal locator beacons on the 406 MHz channel (example) are the current gold standard for distress signals.

Indeed so - but as far as I've been able to dig up so far, they require a bit more gold than I can afford.

Such beacons are required to be (re)programmed with a serial number appropriate for the country they're to be used in, which can only be done at an authorized dealer, which makes online purchases from other countries almost pointless. As near as I can tell, the nearest place I can get such a beacon is at mec.ca , where the least expensive example I can find is $265, above my budget for camping electronics.

I'd be happy to have such a device; I just don't see how I can acquire one with my particular level of fixed income.