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Jacobian comments on A Rationalist Guide to OkCupid - Less Wrong Discussion
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I think we may mean different things by "effort".
I referred as effort to the invisible things you do behind the scenes to maximize your odds, like spending hours reading profiles, crafting strong messages and analyzing your matches. I broadly agree that when you get to the visible part, i.e. going on the actual date, you probably shouldn't treat it as intense labor and relax into who you actually are - more on that in Part 2.
That's a good distinction, and obvious in retrospect. Thank you!
I'm interested in Part 2; I'll keep my eye out.