Here is a new post at EconLog in which Bryan Caplan discusses how signalling contributes to the status quo bias.
The lesson: In the real world, signaling naturally tends to ossify behavior - to lock in whatever the status quo happens to be. If you're an optimist, you can protest, "It's only a tendency." But even an optimist should admit that this tendency leads to atypically slow and unreliable progress.
Your examples are mostly intolerance of specific things, and I agree that there's plenty of that going on; and I also agree that a good deal of our public praise of "tolerance" is probably not completely true. My question was however whether we really disliked weirdness itself, not specific weird behaviors. If we irrationally dislike 20% of weird behaviors, than we may not be living up to our ideals of tolerance, but it's also unlikely that that intolerance is slowing our progress down much.
(edit) To take an example from another branch of this thread, a video game startup may claim to not have any dress code like those boring stuffy banks, but anybody wearing a suit will be sneered at anyway. SO, they are still intolerant, despite their claims to the contrary, BUT, a norm of accepting anything but a suit allows for a lot more variance than a norm of only accepting suits, so in practice you'll still get the benefits of tolerance (in terms of finding comfortable clothes).
On the other hand, someone who consistently dresses as a distinguished gentleman can do so in a jeans-and-T-shirt culture, if he actually is a distinguished gentleman. When the richest dudes around wear Crocs and bike shorts, it's just another way of expressing personality.
That said, the situation for women's clothing seems to be substantially more fraught, especially for engineers.
(And I expect it is different a... (read more)