All of MartinChatwin's Comments + Replies

Good post! I saw Kaj's response to having what he feels is "a bit of an 'aura of trustworthiness'," and that seems to be a phenotypical Real Life example of the Big Seeming Small, which, in my mind, demands a very separate discussion from the intentions of the seemer.

This post may be about intentions in seeming, but there also exist important lacks-of-intentions-in-seeming which came to the fore of my mind when reading this.

I am a large man, with a neanderthal-ish face, a strong chin, and a voice that sounds very much as if one or ... (read more)

Helen170

Hey Martin,

A lot of your comment actually sounds pretty familiar to me.

The main suggestion I have based on what you wrote is to pick a small number of specific things you'd like to do differently, then gradually practice those in some conversations, treating it explicitly as practice that you will need to do for a while, not as a magic fix that you'd be able to implement perfectly if only you were a good enough person.

To unpack that:

  • Specific things to do differently: from your comment, it already sounds like you've already identified some th
... (read more)