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Meditation, insight, and rationality. (Part 2 of 3)
sruch00

Ok an update on my experiences: a few days ago I sat and had less wandering and odd visuals, and then I had a strong tingling sensation starting at my neck and running down my body. Like shivering but no actual body movement - stronger than my previous tingling and different. This one travelled through the body. This happened over and over about 10-15 times. I was noting things like happy, calm, excited. It was pretty enjoyable, almost sensual. I was not aware meditating can produce these odd sensations. It's very interesting. Since then I have had a small... (read more)

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Meditation, insight, and rationality. (Part 2 of 3)
sruch00

I can always see extremely fast vibration in the visual field, like dozens per second at least (maybe hundreds - too fast to tell). It's like a tv station showing snow on an empty channel. That's what I see in the graininess all the time.

Now, though I am beginning to very faintly see a slower but still very fast vibration overlaying all of the graininess. I see this sometimes but not always. It's very fast - faster than I can label it. Maybe 10-20 per second. In this case do you just label as fast as possible and try to keep up?

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0DavidM
The first paragraph isn't about vibrations. That's just visual junk. Looking at it closely will make vibrations apparent. The second paragraph sounds like it's about vibrations. The rapidly-changing graininess is overlaid by another pulse, yes? How do you know that it's a pulse, unless you can almost-sort of see the fluctuation from "nothing" to "something" to "nothing"? (In stage 2 the "something" is clearest, so don't expect the "nothing" to be overwhelming.) If you can't label "pulse" or "seeing" fast enough, try "that." If you still can't do it fast enough, simply see the vibrations without being distracted, or count them. Balance just seeing with labeling if distraction is a problem. Re-read my stage 2 advice in the post. I'll be away for a few days, starting now, so you're on your own for awhile. Sounds like you'll be fine.
Meditation, insight, and rationality. (Part 2 of 3)
sruch00

Meds are for treatment resistant mild depression and social anxiety. But I think the doc may suspect bipolar ii or similar since the lamictal is new. Will report back on this new method.

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Meditation, insight, and rationality. (Part 2 of 3)
sruch00

What do you mean by "nothing"? Absense of a tingle? Absense of all physical sensation?

Not really sure. It's moving to fast to tell. The nothing part seems different from neutral awake mode though.

Your concentration is relatively good, and when it gets to a certain point, it produces this effect, but the effect distracts you, your concentration falls apart, and the effect disappears

This might be the case. Will expect it next time so it won't break my concentration.

I assume that if you're in stage 2, you're in the beginning, because you di

... (read more)
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0DavidM
Before you continue with this, I'm formally recommending that you run what you're doing by your doctor and get your doctor's permission before you do it. Not because I think this practice is (or isn't) going to be problematic for you, but because I don't know what your mental health situation is, and your well-being is important enough not to put solely in the hands of someone on the internet. Also, I strongly suggest explaining what you're doing to a close friend, and having them check in with you every so often to make sure you're OK. The rest of what I write is predicated on your having checked with your doctor and gotten his or her approval to continue. (If you don't mind saying, what is the exact diagnosis that you're prescribed those medications for? Feel free not to say if you don't want to share publicly.) ---------------------------------------- So, taking Zoloft and Lamictal probably is influencing this. My guess is that Lamictal will alter or suppress the mood / emotional stuff that can happen in stage 2. Zoloft probably has some effect, too, but I have no idea what. Let's talk about your visual field. I don't know the cause of what you're describing, and I think it's common enough, but what you mention about it pulsing is probably different. It might be vibrations. Here's how to find out. Look closely at any part of your visual field with eyes open, when you can see the graininess. (Make sure you're looking at a static scene.) I'll suppose you're looking at a quarter. It should appear to you that the graininess is commingled with the image of the quarter, or that the image of the quarter is "arising out of" or "formed by" the grain. If the pulses you're describing are vibrations, then the grain / quarter is the "something." Label every pulse that you see, and label very quickly. If you label fast enough (or can see enough pulses) it should become obvious to you that there is also a moment where the grain and the quarter simply aren't there; this
Meditation, insight, and rationality. (Part 2 of 3)
sruch00

I would probably say that the sensations are slightly pleasant, but yet slightly foreign and odd. Focus seems better before this happens. Definitely better than when I start. Seems to fluctuate maybe 10 to 20 per second. I can sort of describe it as something then nothing alternating, with the something being stronger. I can probably observe it better next time if this is useful. Its almost too fast. You seem to be saying that these might be comprised of even smaller parts, since you said its a good place to look. Are actual vibrations different?

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0DavidM
It sounds like you may be describing vibrations, in one sensory modality only. What do you mean by "nothing"? Absense of a tingle? Absense of all physical sensation? Physical sensations are a good place to look for vibrations because there are a lot of physical sensations that everyone seems to recognize are made up of fluctuating stuff. Most people are more attuned to this kind of fluctuation than to fluctuations in other modalities. Vibrations in other modalities are actually kind of similar, except that they don't "tingle", they just...fluctuate. Maybe tingling is a good metaphor for that. Two main possibilities that I see: 1) Your concentration is relatively good, and when it gets to a certain point, it produces this effect, but the effect distracts you, your concentration falls apart, and the effect disappears. ("Concentration" here means something like "ability to keep your attention on one object," which is different from the typical meaning, and isn't the same process as concentrating during everyday tasks.) If your concentration was better, the tingling would become stronger, and very pleasant. Concentration simultaneously brings on this particular sensation and breaks it up into easy-to-discern vibrations. 2) You are somewhere in stage 2 (probably the beginning, but who knows), which has random pleasant (or simultaneously pleasant / weird or pleasant / unpleasant) tingly sensations as a characteristic of it. So, you can distinguish between these possibilities as follows. Next time you get this tingling, don't label it 'that', but label it 'that-that-that-that-that-that...', one label for each fluctuation you can discern. Try to see each fluctuation clearly, from the "something" to the "nothing". Even if you can't see all 10 or 20 per second, do your best. If the tingling is caused by good concentration, this will likely make it go away quickly. If the tingling is caused by being in stage 2, this is more likely to extend it or intensify it or bring on
Meditation, insight, and rationality. (Part 2 of 3)
sruch10

First time poster here. Decided to try this about a week ago. Been doing this about 30-45 minutes a day since then. Here's my experience:

First 2 days: Did the breathing and labeling, not too hard to concentrate but got distracted and labeled the distractions. No vibrations. Not sure what you mean by that exactly.

Mid-week until today: At about 20 minutes in, I notice a couple of things going on. I start to sort of forget what I am supposed to say when labeling or forget to label altogether. I will get confused and not know that I am supposed to say "... (read more)

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0DavidM
The imagery you're describing is really interesting. :) Could be a lot of things. If you're feeling dreamy while it's happening then it's probably because you're getting tired. Try standing up, siting in an uncomfortable position, drinking coffee, or something like that. Forgetting what label to use or forgetting to label sounds like sleepiness. You said the shivers are "not unpleasant," does that mean "slightly pleasant" or absolutely neutral? How would you say your focus is during the moments leading up to it, compared to when you start meditating or get weird imagery? Body sensations like tingling, shivering, pins-and-needles, etc. are really good places to search for vibrations. It's probably obvious to you that sensations like this aren't static, but are comprised of rapidly fluctuating sub-sensations. (Imagine what it would mean if "tingling" was a static sensation. Would you even call it "tingling"?) So, how rapidly do they fluctuate? How quickly can you observe the sensations that comprise them? I may have more to say if you can tell me more.