PeterS comments on Absolute denial for atheists - Less Wrong

39 Post author: taw 16 July 2009 03:41PM

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Comment author: PeterS 16 July 2009 08:00:21PM 0 points [-]

I still don't understand, but alright... I'm thinking either you're somewhat deranged, or that I've been the victim of a gag of some sort.

Comment author: CronoDAS 16 July 2009 08:38:02PM *  2 points [-]

Sorry. Anyway, "child abuse" is in quotes because I don't think "honest, justifiable actions that nevertheless cause harm" should count as abuse. To quote from what I linked to:

In order for something to count as “child abuse”, the person who performs the action must betray either an intention to harm or a callous disregard for the possibility of harm to the welfare of the child. Even negligence (a form of child abuse) is understood in this way – as the absence of a level of concern for a child’s welfare that would have motivated caution in a concerned individual.

...

Women who took thalidomide while pregnant did significant harm to their children. Yet, this was not sufficient to charge them with "child abuse". This is because the behavior was motivated by a mistake, not by an absence of concern (or a desire to harm) the child. Calling thalidomide users "child abusers" for actions taken before the harmfulness of thalidomide was known is grossly inappropriate.

Anyway, I don't think that the infrequent corporal punishment my father inflicted on me was, in the long run, particularly harmful (apart from the moments of pain I endured). It was also effective.

I won't defend my overall upbringing as "not harmful", though; the special education school I ended up attending for many years was an awful place, and I learned very little there. The fault lies more with the school system than with my parents, though.

Comment deleted 16 July 2009 09:10:48PM *  [-]
Comment author: CronoDAS 16 July 2009 10:55:40PM 0 points [-]

If I may ask, what exactly do you think that it was "effective" at doing?

It was effective at getting me to stop hitting my father. (I hit him far less than I hit anyone else.) I'm not claiming anything more than that.

To quote one of your links:

The single desirable association was between corporal punishment and increased immediate compliance on the part of the child.

Seriously, though, if a 7-year-old attacks you in a furious rage, punching, kicking, and screaming, and continues to keep it up for hours at a time, what do you do?

Yeah because, hey, you love your parents.

I don't know if I actually do love them, but I do respect them. Or, at least, I respect them now that I've grown up.

I'm not saying they're blameless (good luck finding a single blameless individual anywhere over the age of one year) but, well, whatever you've heard about soul-destroying schooling, I had to live it. After not fitting in during elementary school (I threw a crayon at the principal once) I eventually wound up in special education. There were basically two kinds of children in the special education school I went to from third to seventh grade: those that were retards, and those that were evil. Guess which group I ended up hanging out with? My best friend was basically a young Hannibal Lecter. Once, we tried to kill our teacher with what we thought was a bomb.

To be frank, the only shot I would have had at a decent educational experience would have been if my mother decided to homeschool me. This was way before homeschooling became acceptable, and as the school system seemed bound and determined to find a way to blame my parents for the way I acted (which you can probably blame on my being born with a non-standard brain) to the point where it was like they ought to be bringing a lawyer with them to every meeting with school officials, they really didn't want to do anything weird.

Additionally, you might want to look into this.

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