Glad you enjoyed it, and it's good to meet another straight-edge here (although you don't seem to fully identify with the term, which is ok! I'm not sure I do either).
I heard of the strategy of masturbating before going on a date before, but I mostly heard it as an advice to be less nervous (somehow). Your advice seems sensible, although I'm not sure how effective it would be, in that it would release a ton of hormones that make you happy right before meeting someone, and could alter your vision of them. I really don't know haha, just saying there are probably a lot of unknowns unknowns here (and I'm not sure how much they're worth figuring out).
Agreed. And a trans man who doesn't take hormone would also be affected similarly. I think saying man/woman or male/female is a bit inaccurate in this context because of that (also because not everyone means the same thing when they say male/female; some refer to a biological reality, so having certain genitalia, and some give it the same meaning as man and woman, so a gender identity). I prefer to use a term that is both accurate and unambiguous (+ that encompasses the other realities I mentioned in my former comment, like intersex people and such), even if that means a lengthier sentence.
I didn't know about these numbers for PCOS, that's good to know.
I'm note sure what you mean by specific intersex condition; afaik, intersex people can have all sorts of combinations of sex attributes (they can have a vagina and XY chromosomes for instance, or a vagina and internal testicles, and so on; one of those variables would be their level of hormones). Another specific reason someone with a vagina would produce predominantly testosterone is if they're a trans man on hormone replacement therapy.
What I mean by predominantly is that they would produce more testosterone than estrogen (or the other way around); since cis women are more sensitive to the effects of hormones produced when having sex because they produce more estrogen, is it my understanding that the same would be true of someone who produces predominantly estrogen, regardless of their gender.
Interesting point. I do think there are risks in avoiding physical intimacy altogether, for vastly different reasons. Now, trying to navigate when it's harmful to have physical intimacy and when it's not is the hard part!
Yes that's what it means. It's specifically addressed in my blogpost (based on 3 studies, referred in the footnotes):
"Which is where this hormone’s double-edged sword emerges. Excellent recent work has shown that oxytocin does indeed promote pro-social behavior, but crucially, only toward in-group members. In contrast, when dealing with out-group members or strangers, oxytocin’s effects are the opposite. In such settings, the hormone decreases trust, and enhances envy and gloating for the successes and failures, respectively, of the out-group member. Moreover, the hormone makes people more pre-emptively aggressive to out-group members, and enhances unconscious biases toward them. In other words, a hormone touted for its capacity to enhance pro-sociality does no such thing. Instead, what it does is worsen Us/Them dichotomies, enhancing in-group parochialism as well as outgroup xenophobia."
And I do say sex can be potentially harmful to true selfhood, but it's not my main point/concern at all.
My only question is, why privilege your “natural state” so much?
I don't; I value my sober state, and I already addressed why at the beginning of the article. I don't really see anything to add here. And anyway, having sex is one of the most natural things, so trying to moderate it wouldn't really fall under a naturalistic fallacy.
For example, why would I think my anger at my partner is more authentic than how I would feel if we had sex?
This was pretty much addressed in the blogpost already, with the 4 key points I extracted from the article on toxic relationships. Sex can kind of wirehead you to feel close to someone, regardless of if they're a good partner or not. I do feel like this cocktail of hormones could tie me into a relationship that I wouldn't actually want if I stopped having sex with this person for a while and really thought about us - but I agree that "authenticity" is a vague, subjective concept, and you make of it what you will.
If your partner hurt you or was disrespectful to you in anyway, you'd be right to feel anger at them. I know some people use sex as a band-aid in their relationship, but that never addresses the underlying issues and doesn't seem to work in the long run.
I think saying “everything in moderation” is a really unsatisfying answer, but it’s true here. Sex can warp your judgment but it’s also a need for most people.
I do agree here. I never once mention in my text that people should abstain from sex completely, and I far from want that for myself. I specifically say "We might also want to refrain from sex in some situations". The last 3-4 paragraphs point to idea of how one could decide to navigate their sex life if they want to continue having sex but avoid some of the drawbacks of it.
Interesting point. The article I link to talks more specifically about how these hormones interact with oestrogen, hence why I thought it was more relevant than blood levels. Thanks for specifying that.
Otherwise, talking about producing predominantly oestrogen is a more accurate way to talk about what I'm referring to than saying male/female. I know it sounds odd to some, but I don't mind. The thing is that some people have a penis (so someone you might call a male) and produce predominantly oestrogen, and some people have a vagina (so someone you might call a female) and produce predominantly testosterone. Be it because they're trans and on hrt, or because they're a cis woman and have PCOS, or because they're intersex, or for other reasons. I prefer to be accurate with my language so there's no confusion.
Good thing I only date unusual people :P I mean, people "take a break" all the time, I don't see why this kind of break in particular would be more alarming.
Also, this was meant more as a rough example of a policy that could be taken from this knowledge than anything; you can use it any way you see fit (including doing nothing about it of course).
I wrote this blogpost but I did not post this article on Facebook myself, so I have no idea what were the motivations behind those decisions. I would be curious too see what they said!
Ok I understand. So maybe I should switch for another word than produce? Just as plain as "people who have more estrogen than testosterone in their blood", or something of the likes?