Another possibility is that if a woman makes a courteous and straightforward statement of interest, there's no guarantee that the man is likewise interested, but she might interpret this as being wrong for being straightforward rather than that there was no way he was going to reciprocate.

From the comments, and I admit there was less than I thought there was going to be:

I remember when I first started dating my fiancé (four years ago now!), he told me that if a woman tells a man she likes him before he makes a move, he'll stop liking her. I thought this was supremely stupid, so I told my dad about it in a can-you-believe-he-said-that-roll-eyes fashion, but my dad actually told me he thinks that's true! I definitely want to break that train of thought in the next generation. It's really stupid, like teaching women that speaking up makes them unattractive. And seriously, if I hadn't been direct about my feelings when I started dating my fiancé, it would've taken forever for our relationship to become more serious, because who wants to risk rejection by asking out someone who has given no indication that they like you?

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It's fascinating to me because I'm recently divorced and back in the dating game, and I am failing miserably because I refuse to do this. I'm an honest and open person. I don't believe in playing games, and the games confuse me anyway. If I like someone, I tell them. And apparently this is now perceived as "coming on too strong" and is INTIMIDATING? My friends are convinced I push people away by being too forward. My gosh, I'm not saying, "Hello, nice to meet you, let's screw." I'm saying things like, "We've been talking for awhile and I think you're interesting. Let's get drinks sometimes." How is this intimidating? I think you hit the nail on the head.

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One of the reasons women may not want to say yes immediately is the continuing social stigma attached to confident, self-assured women. I have always rejected the hard-to-get routine, and been clear in my requests for friendship or sex. Some men have been frightened by my assertiveness, but many have been relieved by it.

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" I felt conflicted about being as blunt and up-front as I am about dating because it was contradictory to all the advice I'd always been given, but to do otherwise feels dishonest. However, everything paid off when I found my boyfriend. He's totally clueless when it comes to "playing the dating game" so he didn't push me, or try to read into what I said. He took my honesty at face value, and every "no" as a "no."

This one might be evidence-- it depends on what she meant by "everything paid off when I found my boyfriend". I'm inclined to think that her honesty didn't work a few times.

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