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Considering castration seems to indicate that you believe you are the monster, under the bed or wherever.
This may be a reasonable viewpoint for you or for others, or you may view sexual urges of any kind as deviant.
Get other opinions. For the outlying opinions, visit Provincetown, MA [either in person or virtually].
Good luck with what you are struggling with.
I don't think that he wanted to be castrated for the sake of other people, but for his own sake. Maybe the "urges" are distracting and useless. I sympathize, but castration has too big side effects for me to use it.