In the style of Jeff Foxworthy's "You Might Be A Redneck If..."

If you're waking up and the characters in your dream start asking you to stay asleep a bit longer because they're running on your brain and they don't want to be consigned to oblivion just yet... you might be on LW too much.

 

Happened to me this morning, it was kinda weird, and I felt kinda sad. In fairness, it might just be my subconscious brain telling me I need to get more damn sleep.

Anyone have similar stories?

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"You might have been on LW for too much if..."

  • you read the world "cult" and feel the urge to substitute it with "phyg"
  • you hear a misuse of the word "rationality" and it's like cat nails scratching on a blackboard
  • 99.9% of the time the word "rationality" is misused
  • you often try to explain to your friends that Einstein wasn't that smart
  • your answer to the question "are you certain?" is a 30 minutes dissertation on probability
  • your answers to a "true or false" test are 30 pages long dissertations on map and territory
  • you try to pay the rent with your beliefs (the landlord might not be happy)
[-]Rain280

Before LW, I once had a dream where I entered a world of people as a prophet to teach them there was a reality above theirs, that their realm was a false one, that only I knew the truth. The dream was incredibly long and involved; I have it all written down, and it's fascinating to see how self-consistent it is. As I climbed out of their world, once again espousing to them they should find a way into the real world, I woke up.

Likely, your dream could have happened without LW, and this site just provides some extra context to make it more memorable.

  • You consider Pascal’s wager a compelling argument for atheism. Sure, being a Christian might give you a shot at eternal life, but that’s nothing compared to chance of flimple utlitions.

  • You want a career that gives back to the world. So you quit your job as inner-city schoolteacher to become an investment banker..

  • After landing a six-figure salary at Goldman Sachs, you become frustrated with your paltry wages. So you fly to Australia to get a job busing tables.

Second, if you hear about two or more Flimples, the first one you hear about is lexicographically greater than any others.

We could make a really nice Pascal's wager Ponzi scheme from this. Paypal Eliezer $5, then replace his name with your own and post it on as many forums as you can find...

...so you quit your job as inner-city schoolteacher to become an investment banker.

This is my favorite of these so far by a comfortable margin.

I had five more of these, but they keep the site keeps garbling them and I need to get to bed.

[-]Shmi190

I reach for the (non-existent) downvote button when there is a particularly bad paper on the arxiv.org preprint server.

I don't consider myself particularly trigger-happy with downvotes, but it's become surprisingly distressing to see something I disapprove of and be completely powerless to passively express that disapproval.

I've long maintained that Facebook ought to have a “dislike” button (since long before I found LessWrong, and shortly after the “like” button was added), but now I sometimes look for it. (Also, I think I've accidentally used Markdown on Wikipedia.)

[-]Shmi40

It wouldn't work on Facebook. The level of maturity is not there, people would just use it for bullying and revenge.

Yeah, right, because the “like” button is never used for cheering and arse-licking.

[-]Shmi20

Of course it is. But this is much less damaging than bullying. Just think through it for a moment. What would happen if one could anonymously downvote pictures/posts of their "friends"? Clearly the meanness would spread unchecked until almost everything is downvoted out of spite.

The FB environment is completely unlike (no pun intended) LW or even Reddit. There there is not even a pretense of learning or any kind of rational discourse. As a result of potential dislikes, the amount of stuff people post on FB would go down drastically, and so would the average number of friends per person. One might think that it is a good thing, but it would certainly negatively impact the profits and publicity of the Facebook itself.

What would happen if one could anonymously downvote pictures/posts of their "friends"?

Facebook likes are not anonymous, and dislikes wouldn't be either. It's not unlike posting a comment saying “Boo”, minus the trivial inconvenience of having to type.

The FB environment is completely unlike (no pun intended) LW or even Reddit.

So what? The purpose of likes is different from the purpose of upvotes, too, and dislikes would just be the mirror image. (The idea of dislikes first occurred to me before I had ever heard of LW or Reddit.)

As a result of potential dislikes, the amount of stuff people post on FB would go down drastically,

Why? Youtube also has dislikes, and it's not like people stopped uploading new videos or commenting when they were implemented.

and so would the average number of friends per person.

Why?

[-]Shmi60

dislikes would just be the mirror image

It really wouldn't. Negative feedback is much more potent than equal positive feedback. Anyway, the reasons why FB has stayed and will stay away from dislikes (and google+ from -1) have been rehashed online to no end (basically, hate doesn't sell ads or products). Tapping out.

XKCD is quickly turning into the "simpsons did it" of nerd jokes.

Signs you're on LW too much

First comment on such a topic, does that count?

Signs you're on LW too much: You read this post. Bonus points if you respond. Extra bonus points if you wrote it. N tbyq fgne vs lbh qrpbqrq guvf cneg. But the best way to be sure about it is to raise the issue at your next meetup.

Cheater. You can't give extra points to yourself.

I thought he was giving extra points to Eneasz.

Thought he meant the comment. My bad.

Link to translation: “N tbyq fgne vs lbh qrpbqrq guvf cneg.” through ROT13

Yes, I know it kind of ruins the point.

Alarm Clock = Murder.

[-]maia80

Something similar happened to me a few nights ago. Except the dream character was like, "Something really terrible is about to happen to me, and since my continuity of experience is assured by real-life Maia continuing to exist, I'm okay with the personality part of me dying. (Proceeds to commit suicide by trying to wake up)"

You can't remember whether or not bleggs exist in real life.

[-][anonymous]30

Oh look! it's the original poster of the shit rationalists say thread.

yes?

[-][anonymous]40

Part of it is to say: here's a relevant link. The other part is: I spend so much time on LW I remember people's posts by their username.

No malice intended.

Downvoted for sarcasm.

But ADBOC.

You get annoyed at things lacking citations and links.

You say "I may be inferring from one example but..." or similar.

You know intimate details of the personal lives of the Bay Area crowd, despite living on a different continent.

Sry, no time to comment. On LW.