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sixes_and_sevens comments on Open Thread, July 1-15, 2013 - Less Wrong Discussion
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I recently remarked that the phrase "that doesn't seem obvious to me" is good at getting people to reassess their stated beliefs without antagonising them into a defensive position, and as such it was on my list of "magic phrases". More recently I've been using "can you give a specific example?" for the same purpose.
What expressions or turns of phrase do you find particularly useful in encouraging others, or yourself, to think to a higher standard?
depersonalizing the argument is something I've had great success with. Steelmanning someone's argument directly is insulting, but steelmanning it by stating that it is similar to the position of high status person X, who is opposed by the viewpoint of high status person Y allows you to discuss otherwise inflammatory ideas dispassionately.
I've experimented with repersonalizing arguments: instead of challenging someone else for holding a belief, I direct the challenge at myself by putting their argument in my own mouth and saying what contrary evidence prevents me from believing it.
Someone else: You know that global warming business is a load of rubbish, right? Isn't real.
Me: That's not obvious to me. There are records of global average surface temperatures going back 150 years or so.
Someone else: Well, they can't know what the temperature was like before then.
Me: I'm sometimes inclined to think so, but then I'd have to contend with the variety of records based on tree rings, ice cores, and boreholes which go back centuries or millennia.
This is not quite what you want, but if you are a grad student giving a talk and a senior person prefaces her question to you with "I am confused about...", you are likely talking nonsense and they are too polite to tell you straight up.
Which reminds me of my born-again Christian mother - evangelicals bend over backwards to avoid dissing each other, so if you call someone "interesting" in a certain tone of voice it means "dangerous lunatic" and people take due warning. (May vary, this is in Perth, Australia.)
Alternatively "I may hve misunderstood but surely...." is a good way to couch an objection
I frequently use "Hmm, it's not entirely clear to me that [X]...", which seems very directly analogous to yours.
I like this, and also "I don't quite understand why [X]", which puts them in the pleasant position of explaining to me from a position of superiority--or sometimes realizing that they can't.
I guess this only works on people who feel friendly. Making them also feel superior... now they owe you a decent explanation.
A hostile person could find other way to feel superior, without explanation. For example, they could say: "Just use google to educate yourself, dummy!"